My Calling to Love my Husband

I'm just going through a personal study called "Created to be His Help Meet" by Debi Pearl. (website address www.NoGreaterJoy.org ) What an incredible book for all wives. It's a book on discovering how God can make your marriage glorious. It's a great book and it has taught me a lot. It is really speaking to me and showing me, through God's Word the Bible, where my place is in my marriage and in my life. When I chose to be married, I chose to become my husband's helper. I haven't always done well at that, but through grace, mercy and testing, God is showing me how to be the helper to my husband that He wants me to be. I don't have to listen to everyone else tell me what I need to do and who I need to be, but what's most important is that I'm listening to God show me and tell me who He wants me to be.
I know God wants me to love my husband no matter what. God has shown me that I am God's gift to my husband - I was created to fill a need-his need. I want to be what God created me to be. I know God is using me to help my husband to be more caring and sensitive, because men are not naturally that way - but even if he's not, to love him anyway. How many times does my husband have to love me in spite of all my faults and quircky ways. How many times do my children have to love me in spite of the mistakes that I make with selfish parenting ways at times.
God has not finished His work in me. God is teaching me how to uphold my husband in prayer and love. God wants me to teach my children an example of a godly marriage and a devoted wife through the good times and bad. I am to show my husband daily how much I love him and appreciate him. I am to serve Him in love, not resentment, bitterness or anger. What good does it do me if I feel that I have to show him in a resentful way what he has done to hurt me, or if I wanna make him 'see' my hurt feelings by my petty, selfish ways. That does me no good. God didn't create me to be selfish and look after my own interests and desires and to neglect my husband or my children. He created me to be a helper and to sacrifice what 'I want' to serve my family, in spite of times that they will or have hurt me with unkind words or actions.
When I became one with my husband, I committed myself before God and witnesses and my husband, to love him till death us do part. I love my husband dearly, with all my heart. God knew exactly who to send me to be my partner for life. He knew exactly who I needed to compliment my characteristics and to meet me halfway with our differences. God gave me the perfect man for me - He knew best. I love God for giving me the husband that He did. We have been so blessed with over 17 years of marriage, a wonderful church family, beautiful children, parents who love us and raised us the best they knew how in spite of the circumstances of their own difficult lives and upbringings. No things haven't always been perfect, what marriage is perfect, but God has led us through all the way. I praise Him for where He has brought us from, I praise Him for where He is bringing us to, and I praise Him for everything He has done in our lives together.

Continue to teach me Lord to be the wife that You want me to be. Forgive me for the times that I have been selfish, wanting my own way, and not turning to You for guidance each day. God, you have not called me to love anyone on my own - I need your love to love to the fullest. I need You God, to show me the extent of Your forgiveness and mercy so that I can bestow it to others around me. Each day Lord, I need to lean on You to show me the way and to guide me through the challenges of parenting our children and loving my husband the way You want me to. You've created me Lord to be my husband's help meet, to be his helper and I can only follow that calling in my life with your help - I cannot do it on my own. Life's pressures and temptations each day bombard me to take my focus off of You, Lord, help me to stay on track. So many marriages are falling apart all around us God, and I pray that will never happen to us. My desire is to have You first in our marriage, in my life, and in my children's lives. May we never leave Your teachings, Your ways, O God, may our desire always be to follow You with all our heart, with all our soul, and with all our mind. Thank you for loving me, cherishing me, and creating me. Thank you most of all for sending Your Son Jesus to die on the cross to forgive us our sins, rising again and now living in Heaven so we can have eternal life. And thank you so, so, so much for giving me the husband that you did - a husband who loves me, protects me, provides for our family, cherishes me, makes me laugh, and is my best friend. Help me to be the best wife ever for my hubby. Amen.